Vladislav Babienko | Unsplash
I don’t always trust myself.
I don't always trust that I know what to do.
I get indecisive. I look to others for the answers. I may lean on the societal norm. I'm dying to know the RIGHT answer.
Even when I know what to do, I don't always trust that I'm cut out for it.
I question if I am ready for this, if I have enough experience, and if I'm emotionally, mentally, and physically capable.
I get to the point with decisions where I can't make one without just a little bit of anxiety, overthinking, and heartache.
When it comes to making a decision, sometimes the last thing I do is trust ourselves. When really the first thing we need to do is trust ourselves.
It is the biggest mistake I’ve made in a lot of my decision-making. I need to trust that I have the strength to do anything and everything will work out one way or another.
That is easier said than done and can't always be figured out with a pro-con list.
Whether its taking on new project at work, navigating a relationship with a significant other, or pursuing a new passion, it is easy to slip into a storm of indecisiveness and questioning.
I don't want to ride into that storm anymore that I have found myself in too often. I don't want my indecisiveness and questioning to hold me back from opportunities and what I actually want in life. I want to trust myself and live my life with more confidence and grace.
So here are 6 things I've found to help me trust myself to make a decision and skip the anxiety, overthinking, and heartache.
Recognize if fear is driving the decision over facts.
Sometimes we decide that we aren't capable or something isn't going to work out, but we don't have a way to explain why. Usually, it is because there is this intangible fear that is holding us back. If you don't have a reason why you're making a decision, you may be able to find clarity and comfort in the facts. Let that drive your decision.
You know you better than anyone else does.
Even if someone knows you, you know you better. You know what you really love, what your experiences are, what your perspective is, and what feels true to you. This won't change and don't let someone convince you otherwise.
Don't give power to things you don't care about.
We tend to give power to things we don't actually value for the purpose of fitting into the societal norm. We let society's traditional ways of doings things or definitions of success distract us from what we want to do and what success looks like to us. We need to give power to the things we do care about and let that drive our decision.
Know that you have the strength to make the decision, even if you don't know what it is.
This comes down to self talk. We need to convince ourselves that even if you don't know what the decision is, you know you have the strength inside of you to make it. The language you use with yourself goes a long way with being kind to yourself during the decision process.
Ask what would make you proud of yourself.
At the end of the day, what would make you most proud? What would make you feel like you pushed past complacency, got what you wanted instead of what someone else wanted, and helped you grow?
Know that even if it doesn't work out, there are still going to be good things in your life.
The sad reality is sometimes we are going to make a decision and later find out that its best to go in a different direction. Even if things don't work out, it is important to recognize that it doesn't ruin your life. You can still have good things going for you and you have an intangible amount of learning to take away, possibly leading you to the next right decision.
And if none of these resonate with you, just breathing is always a good fall back.