What is Helping Me Drink in Moderation

Kelly Sikkema

Right now, we are in the middle of football tailgating season and I love a good tailgate.

I also love a good brewery, holiday get-together, wedding, or meet-up with old friends.

All these fun things usually involve more than the average amount of drinking, or least for me it does. Having some drinks is a social norm for a lot of people I spend time with and environments I’m in.

But then there is the day after a large amount of drinking. My stomach hurts, my head hurts, and most of all, I get anxious. Anxious to the point where my physical feeling matches my mental feeling in terms of how much it hurts.

When I was in college, I kind of just dealt with the anxiety over and over because it felt like such a way of life. I've found now in my adult life that that endless cycle is unsustainable and doesn't contribute to what I'm trying to accomplish in life.

Some would say just cut out drinking entirely and I have thought about it.

However, I really do enjoy a beer at a brewery in any city that I'm visiting. In college, I did a brewery tour for college credit to get educated in the beer process and supply chain of it, and I’ve now been to close to 90 breweries. There is more to beer than just drinking it to me.

I love going to my parents’ house and having a pre-dinner cocktail with my mom like it is a ritual that I'm home.

I love rolling up to a Penn State football tailgate and being the bartender for everyone.

I think there is a way to still participate in the drinking at these events but drink in moderation. As always, there is a balance to everything.

I don’t always get it perfect, and my family and friends know I’ve had my share of rough nights. However, I want to share some tactics I’ve been using recently to help me drink in moderation, have fun, and not end up with a headache or anxiety the next day.

Ordering a water anytime I order a drink.

If I’m at a bar or restaurant, anytime I order a drink, I try to also order water. This has made drinking water more accessible and more likely for me to consume it.

I’m the girl at the bar that tells herself that the next thing I’ll order is water and gets peer pressured into ordering another drink instead. Or I’ll be sitting there empty-handed, and I feel like I need to order another drink just because it feels weird to be standing there with no cup in my hand.

By ordering a water each time I order a drink, I’ve made it easier for myself to stay hydrated, not default to just drinking more alcohol every time I finish a drink, and not have anyone saying I’m “lame” for only ordering a water the next time I go up to the bar (which is not lame by the way and is you just taking care of yourself).

Putting a non-alcoholic drink in a glass cup.

Sometimes after a long day at work, I want to sit on the couch and have a drink. I will let myself have one during the work week occasionally, but I know drinking doesn’t help me sleep and doesn’t get me re-charged for the next day.

Something I’ve found that holds me over and tricks my brain into thinking I’m having a drink is putting a non-alcoholic drink in a wine or cocktail glass. It makes me feel fancy without the headache.

I especially like putting fizzy or carbonated drinks in my glass like sparkling water, or my personal favorite, Bai Bubbles (which is rarely available to me at my local grocery store so if you see this somewhere at a reasonable price please help a girl out). Friends and family have also recently introduced me to Zevia and Fresca. 

Bringing non-alcoholic drinks that aren't water that I enjoy.

If I’m going to a tailgate or some type of house party, sometimes I will bring myself pop, sparkling water, or Gatorade to have between drinks or when I really don’t want any more alcohol.

Sometimes water between drinks feels boring and I want something with flavor, but I don’t want any more alcohol.

Having something non-alcoholic available that I enjoy helps me not default to drinking alcohol I really don’t need to have.

Is there anything you do that helps you drink in moderation? Tell me in the comments below.

Does Where You Workout Matter?

Yulissa Tagle

Before Covid, I went to the gym or yoga studio almost everyday.

When we went into lockdown, I had to figure out how to workout or do yoga from home.

When the lockdown lifted, I was probably one of the first people to get to the gym despite the extra protocols you had to follow while there. However, I continued to do about half my workouts at home out of pure laziness of not wanting to take that extra step to leave the house.

Working out from home just became so accessible all of a sudden, something I'm super thankful for and maybe something the world needed.

There were a lot of at-home options that I loved.

I found my favorite Youtube workouts. I recommend Sydney Cummings for challenging dumbbell workouts or The Studio by Jaime Kinkeade for a great dance workout.

I found my favorite Youtube yoga teachers. My favorite has been Yoga with Kassandra, especially her yin classes.

I also got to support my local yoga studios and teachers by doing their online zoom classes. I found this to be a great option for before work or during the lunch breaks when you just can't quite make it to the actual studio.

For the last year and a half, I've been on this hybrid workout schedule.

However, I've felt this need lately to start making more of my workouts happen outside my home. 

Like I said, I love the option of working out at-home, but there is something about getting to the gym or doing a group class with other people.

There is this extra motivation that hits me. There is a feeling of belonging, and not isolation. There is this feeling that I'm not the only one pushing through this really hard workout (or any other hard life thing).

Motivation and belonging are things I lost during covid and I want to get them back.

I think working from home, resting at home, and doing just about everything else at home made getting into the workout mindset not easy as well.

It is something about place identity and my body and brain doesn't like doing my workout in the same space I do my work all day or rest at night.

So I’m in the process of doing some "gym shopping" and trying to get to the yoga studio more. I've already had some better workouts and met some new people.

While me going to the gym or yoga studio may require extra time, effort, and money, maybe doing something that contributes to my health and happiness is exactly what I should be spending my energy on.

I want to challenge myself to get out of the house more for workouts as I think it is something that will improve my overall mental and physical well-being. However, everything is a balance and there are days where working out at home is going to serve me more.

Ultimately, I'm very thankful for the multiple options out there to move my body in whatever phase, feeling, or season I am in.

What do you prefer right now, gym workouts, at-home workouts, or a mix? Tell me in the comments below.

My Reflections on 200-Hour Yoga Teacher Training

I had heard yoga teacher training (YTT) will change your life.

Even though I heard how great it would be, I was open-minded going into the experience.

I think that is how I got as much out of it as I did.

They say you should wait and let the dust settle before sitting down and writing out your experience. I'm glad I did.

I'm glad I waited because I'm seeing the effects that the training had on me more today than I did when it actually ended.

There is a lot that is different about me than when I first started the training. The biggest change has been doing things with a softer heart and a more focused mind.

Not being so quick to respond, leading with hope instead of fear, trusting myself more to make decisions, and embracing the people in my life are a few examples.

I knew I wanted to write about this experience to help me process it. However, I didn’t want to just process this experience. I wanted to celebrate this chapter. I wanted to honor this chapter of life.

Every trainee has their own story. This is mine.

May 2020

I was living at my parents’ house in Columbus for 7 weeks. My parents were unemployed, my sisters were home from college, and I was doing my corporate job from my childhood desk.

I don't have to tell you that we were in the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic, but for my future self, that was the time period.

Not a situation I expected to be in.

I found myself landing on my yoga mat day after day. It gave me certainty, stability, and support when I needed it most.

I had been doing yoga for a little over a year, but this time made me truly fall in love with the practice.

This is when I first considered teaching.

June 2020

I was back living at my apartment in Copley and I started researching where I wanted to do my training. I didn't really have a home yoga studio at this point, so I was open to options.

I looked and practiced at a few studios in the Akron area. I landed on doing my training at Yoga Squared.

The schedule and price fit my life, and there was a strong sense of community where I felt like I could truly grow.

I signed up to start in October.

October 2020

I start my training and I already knew I was on to something.

I loved the connection of the body and the mind. It felt like I was here to celebrate that.

For a while now, I'd considered myself a self-healer. I take it upon myself to work through hard things and find creative ways to move forward.

During the second week of training, I realized that there were past traumas I'd been trying to heal for a long time that I hadn't been able to heal on my own.

I knew in this training I would learn a lot about myself and that it may be emotional, but I didn't expect it to happen so quickly.

I ended up finding a therapist the very next week to help me work through some of my traumas. It has been 6 months since I started seeing her. She is a new type of support I hadn't considered before and am thankful to have found her.

Whether YTT intended to teach me or not, I learned that healing happens in all shapes and forms, and you don't have to do it alone.

It can be through journaling, talking to a supportive family member, going to a yoga class, taking a walk, or talking to a therapist.

As a yoga teacher, I was learning to guide people in their healing, whatever that may look like.

November 2020

COVID got really bad. Everyone knew someone who had it. Some of my family members got it. There was a time I was exposed, but had tested negative.

The only two places I could be found was at home or the yoga studio. Training became such a bright light during a dark time. Even though we had to take the precautions of masks and social distancing, being together in a room with people was a powerful thing.

I will say that my YTT experience would have been very different if it wasn't during COVID. There were no social events going on, I was working from home, and the world felt like it was in turmoil.

YTT was a space to work through it together. We weren't only there to learn to teach yoga and support people in healing, but we were able to connect with others when everyone felt alone. I will never forget those moments of leaning on my fellow trainees.

Later in the month, my mom asked if we could start practicing yoga together over zoom. I could practice my teaching, she could develop her yoga, and we could have a standing mother/daughter meeting each week.

It’s been 6 months of practicing together after work on Monday evenings and I love getting to do it.

December 2020

I started asking where I fit within the yoga community. What clothes do yoga teachers wear? What food do yoga teachers eat? Does a teacher wear brand name clothes or shy away from them? Are all yoga teachers vegan?

These are the questions I asked myself as I tried to figure out where I belonged. I started to think about what parts of myself I was going to bring to the yoga space or if this was a place I could truly bring my whole self.

Thanks to my wonderful teachers and fellow trainees, I learned that this was a place I did not need to mold myself.

I could wear what made me feel comfortable and eat what made me feel nourished.

They wanted the real me. My future students wanted the real me.

I took this into account as I started to teach at the front of the room during training. Teaching yoga is harder than it looks and I started to have the greatest respect for those teachers I admired.

January 2021

We got the opportunity to take reiki level one training. Reiki is a Japanese healing method, with “rei” meaning higher consciousness and “ki” meaning life force energy. Some yoga teachers incorporate reiki into their classes.

Reiki training opened my eyes to the vibrations of the cells in our body and how we can use reiki to increase the frequency of the cells to promote healing.

I was skeptical about reiki at first, but as I explored it more, I saw how impactful it can be on the body, mind, and spirit. 

I went on to complete my reiki level two training and now have a morning reiki practice that I perform on myself.

As I learned about reiki and other tools to use in my yoga teaching, I realized how creative yoga could be.

There is a theme of the practice. There is the music and lights. There are poses and sequences. There are props. There is the level of your voice and the energy you bring. There is the environment in which you're practicing.

There are so many things that go into it that you can create something new each practice you teach. We just need to let our creative spirit out.

February 2021

I started exploring what it means to find your dharma. In the yogic teaching, your dharma is your duty or purpose.

I was really thinking about my purpose, so I loved exploring what my dharma was.

I don't think we have to go searching for our dharma, but we find it by doing the things we are drawn to. It isn’t one specific thing, but an overarching principle or purpose that spans across a lot of things.

I think my dharma is to support people in finding resources that better their mental health, like yoga, journaling, reiki, and certain lifestyle choices.

I have struggled with anxiety and knowing there are resources to help has been powerful in improving my well-being.

Everything we do depends on the state of our mental health and if I can support someone in finding grace, acceptance, and compassion for themselves and others, that would be so rewarding.

Maybe my dharma will change. Maybe it won't.

As I explored my dharma more, I started to see how similar yoga and journaling were. I had been journaling for the past three years and I kept finding these synchronicities in yoga. Yoga and journaling are tools to help us be the person we want to be. They're safe spaces to work through things without judgement.

This is when I first came up with the idea to create a yoga + journaling workshop to introduce yogis to journaling.

I ended up hosting my first workshop in May 2021 at Yoga Squared and it was everything and more I wanted it to be. It was as if all the work I had put into my journaling and yoga was coming together.

March 2021

It was time to bring everything I learned from YTT and teach my first demo/class. It was a final examination, but felt like a celebration of becoming a teacher.

I was going to get to share everything I learned from my six months of training with my family, friends, and fellow trainees.

About an hour and a half before the demo, a family matter boiled over and I was in full tears.

In that moment, I had to decide if I was going to carry this into the yoga studio with me. I decided I was going to put it off to the side for now and revisit later because teaching this demo was too important to me.

The demo went better than I could have even expected. Being in the front of the room teaching, I felt I was exactly where I was supposed to be. Maybe I needed a good cry to be able to let go and teach from the heart.

April 2021

My fellow trainees gathered with our teachers to celebrate all the hard work we had done and the bonds we had forged. I couldn't believe it was actually ending. It was a life changing experience, especially alongside a pandemic.

I’m not sure what my yoga journey looks like in the future. Is it teaching, hosting workshops, additional teacher training, or continuing to be a student?

Many people ask, “well don’t you go through yoga teacher training so that you can teach?” Yes and no.

I began training because I wanted to teach and learn more about yoga as a practice.

I learned through the training that teaching yoga is no small feat and the best teachers have to put their heart and time into creating these wonderful sixty-minute experiences.

If I learned anything in YTT it is this: It doesn’t have to be this OR that. It can be this AND that.

It doesn’t have to be one or the other. It can be a little bit of everything. Everything doesn’t have to happen all at once or right now.

Nothing is permanent. We are always changing, shifting, and re-arranging.

I see myself continuing to practice with my mom, maybe do some more workshops, and be a yoga student. Maybe I’ll shift into teaching a regular class in the future or maybe I won’t.

I will just be forever grateful for the opportunity to experience this 200-hour yoga teacher training and I can’t wait to see where I go on my yoga journey. 

A Few Special Thank Yous:

My teachers, Nikki & Kate Woodford-Shell -- Thank you for sharing your wisdom and holding space for me to learn and explore. I know I will continue to learn from you.

My fellow YTT trainees -- While we went on this journey as individuals and each had our own deeply personal experience, we also went on this journey together. I can't imagine doing it without you guys.

My boyfriend Chris and roommate Emily -- Thank you for listening to every little thing I learned through this experience, even if you didn't always understand it.

My mom -- Thank you for being my first student and practicing with me every week over zoom.

My dad and sisters Ally & Lilly -- Thank you for your constant support and cheering me on endlessly.

How I Get My Journal Practice In While On Vacation

Unsplash | Ethan Robertson

Going on vacation can feel like the ultimate test to my consistent journaling practice.

I'm out of routine, in a different environment, and trying not to feel like I have to do or worry about anything.

I see vacation as a time to recharge and relax, and continuing to journal on vacation has let me do that even more.

It gives me time to reflect on what my priorities are and what I'm thankful for.

Here are 3 ways I still get my journal practice in while on vacation.

Take note beforehand how long it usually takes for you to journal.

Before I leave for my trip, I get a gauge on how long my journal practice usually takes. This can give me information on how much time I need to give myself on vacation and helps me plan accordingly. 

Do it first thing when you wake up.

A lot of times my trips are filled with full days of hiking or full days at the pool. Either way, the day can be busy and tiring.

I try to get my journal practice in before the days starts so it is more likely to happen. This is also a nice moment of alone time, especially when spending every other moment of the trip together with people.

Pick a cozy or secluded spot that makes you feel safe to journal.

On vacation, I'm in the rare situation where I'm journaling somewhere other than my home. That can feel unsafe or uncomfortable since journaling is such a vulnerable practice.

Due to that, I try to pick a cozy or secluded spot that makes me feel safe. My favorite place is a spot to gaze out at a lake or pool. Sometimes I have to settle for the hotel bathroom to get some alone time, but hey create a safe space where you can.

My Favorite Personal Development Books That Are Less Than 200 Pages

I'll admit, I'm a self-help nerd.

I find it interesting all the ideas and ways we can better ourselves and development into the person we want to be.

I've read my fair share of personal development books, but I'm specifically drawn to ones that have short, organized chapters that are digestible.

Here are my 3 favorite personal development books that are less than 200 pages.

The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

The Four Agreements are agreements you make to yourself.

This was a great book to pick up when I was feeling stuck, doubting myself, or worrying about what people think as it focused on finding personal freedom.

The Four Agreements are be impeccable with your word, don't take anything personally, don't make assumptions, always do your best.

Linking to it here.

How to Not Always Be Working: A Toolkit for Creativity and Radical Self-Care by Marlee Grace

When I was feeling burnt out or uninspired, this was a great book to pick up.

It took me through healing my creativity and time by creating boundaries in my life. This has great journal prompts at the end of each chapter to help me reflect.

The book took me through identifying what is my work, where do I work, what is not my work, what are the gray areas of my work, how to now work when not working, taking a break, and more.

Linking to it here.

The Yamas and Niyamas by Deborah Adele

Although this is a book about yoga's ethical principles, this can be read by non-yogi's as well.

This book was great to focus on developing 1 aspect of myself at a time. It really dives deep into ethical principles I can focus on apply to my own life.

This book took me through nonviolence, truthfulness, nonstealing, nonexcess, nonpossessiveness, purity, contentment, self-discipline, self-study, and surrender.

Linking to it here.

Are You Focusing on What You Want to DO or What You Want to BE?

I am fascinated, and maybe a little too fixated, on how we spend our time and energy.

But maybe this is something to be proudly fixated on.

Life is short and my time and energy is valuable. I want to live life to the fullest.

If I'm trying to figure out where to put my time and energy, do I focus on what I want to do or what I want to be?

DO vs. BE

My answer to this has changed over time. Here's why.

BEING

When I decided to get into podcasting in late 2018/early 2019, I decided I wanted to focus on BEING a podcaster.

DO vs. BE

I took a podcasting course from one of my favorite podcasters and adopted every single aspect she suggested. I studied the way my other favorite podcasters were doing things and adopted their processes as well.

While this was extremely helpful with getting started BEING a podcaster, in the spring of 2020 I found myself DOING things that I didn't really like and weren't really me. I felt burnt out and unauthentic.

I didn't like what I was DOING. Probably because I was doing what other people liked to do.

MAYBE BEING COULD OF WORKED

I've realized that focusing on BEING could have really worked out for me, but the way I was approaching it wasn't the best.

It wasn't what I was trying to be, it was how I was trying to be it.

I was trying to mold myself into being what a podcaster looked like for other people, instead of asking myself what podcasting could look like for me.

I chose to take everything the people I looked up to were doing and automatically adopted it since I saw that is what was making them successful (or at least in my eyes it was).

I learned something here…

Just because it is working for other people doesn't mean it will work for you. Observe and learn what other people are doing, and take the bits and pieces that you think will fit your personality, goals, and lifestyle you want to live.

I learned that it is important to learn, understand, and DO the things you like.

DOING

When I eventually asked myself what podcasting looked like for me, I wasn't really sure because I was clouded with what everyone else was doing.

I chose to take a step back and instead of focusing on what I wanted to BE, I started focusing on what I wanted to DO.

DO vs. BE

When I started focusing on what I wanted to DO, I saw that my favorite part of podcasting was writing the solo episodes. I loved writing.

The more I thought about it, it made a lot of sense. I loved journaling and as a kid my teachers always had to give me a page limit because I would write so much.

By focusing on what I wanted to DO, I found out what I was really interested in, I felt more creative, tasks became fulfilling, and I felt like I was creating my own path for growth.

I started writing more and this led me to starting my blog in May 2020.

In November 2020, I wrote a blog post on the importance of focusing on DOING instead of BEING. You can read it here.

WHAT COMES AFTER DOING

Since I wrote that blog post, I have continued to write and my thoughts on doing vs. being have really evolved. I'm happy they have and makes me feel like I'm living with my eyes open.

Now that I have a true understanding of what I like DOING, I feel like I can figure out what I want to truly BE based on my interests.

DO —> BE

I can take my love of writing and use that passion to bring my whole self to BEING a blogger.

Most importantly, I can be my version of a blogger.

I feel like what I'm doing and what I want to be are finally aligning.

Knowing what you like to do can be valuable information to becoming the person you actually want to be.

WHAT ABOUT GROWTH

So where do I go from here? How do I grow as a blogger or expand into other things?

I've strategized and experimented with many different ways to grow as a blogger. I've even thought about being a speaker, author, entrepreneur, educator, advocate, etc.

So I asked myself, if I'm going to BE this person (whatever it is), what does that person DO?

 DO <— BE

What do they DO to BE who they are?

Speakers speak. Authors write. Educators educate.

Am I willing to do those things?

It makes me consider how I want to spend my time and energy to become what I want to be.

What am I willing to do to be the person I want to be?

What am I willing to sacrifice? What am I not willing to sacrifice?

How can I create the time and the energy that is required to become the person I want to become?

You can BE anything, but you must define what you are willing to DO to make it happen.

A key part of this is still taking into consideration what you like to do and the bits and pieces you have learned from others that could work for you. 

I've found myself wanting to apply this to more than just being a blogger.

What does an exceptional yoga teacher do? Am I willing to do what is required of that?

What does a supportive girlfriend do? What time and energy can I create to be that?

What does a promotable employee do? What am I willing and not willing to sacrifice in my personal life in order to make that happen?

--

So when it comes to your time and energy, do you focus on what you want to DO or what you want to BE first?

I don't believe there is a wrong answer.

Based on my experience and talking with others, you may go about this based on how your brain works and the path that is going to get you to your version of success.

For me, my brain processes like this:

DO —> BE —> DO

Others' brains might work like this:

BE —> DO

Whatever way you like to figure out how to spend your time and energy, I’ve realized it is about aligning what you want to do and what you want to be.

do = be

How to Get The Most Out of Your Journal Session

Unsplash | Gabrielle Henderson

If we are going to carve out time in our busy day to sit down at our journal, we have to make it worth it.

Our time is valuable and we want the work we put into our journal to pay off by helping us become more present, confident, and able to dream bigger.

While there is no right way to journal, here are 4 strategies to get the most out of your journal session.

Create an action item for yourself.

You may find yourself writing out a lot of feelings or problems that you're dealing with. Many of us use our journal for that.

While writing down these feelings or problems can be extremely beneficial when processing them, following this up with an action item can allow you to put what you're working through in your journal into practice in real life.

Action items could be:

• An affirmation you're going to start saying to help you change your mindset

• A task you're going to complete to help you get closer to fixing the problem or going after your dream

• A conversation you're going to have to gain more understanding or support in a situation

This can be a challenge to do and can take practice, but many more things happen when a plan is put in place.

Give Yourself Plenty of Time

It can be a challenge to find any time in a day to journal. However, if you were to pick a time, try to pick a moment where you won't feel rushed to get through the entry because you have to be at the next thing on your schedule.

Try to find a moment that you can be in the present and not in the past or future.

A strategy you can try is to give yourself 10 more minutes than you think you will need to journal. This can give you time, space, and permission to work through more thoughts if you want to.

And if you don't use it, you have that extra 10 minutes in your day to breathe.

Limit Distractions

To help you really be able to dive deep into your journal session, try to limit the chance for distractions as much as possible.

Maybe this looks like trying to find a time to be in a room by yourself. Maybe it is having your phone in the other room.

Both of these can seem like a long shot with someone always needing something from us. Try to create an environment for yourself that allows you to tap into thoughts, feelings, and ideas, whatever that may look like.

Not in Same Spot Where You Do Work

This is key. When you journal at the spot where you handle your work responsibilities, your brain is in work mode.

This can mean different things for different people. Journaling in the same spot where you work can lead your brain to see journaling as a task you have to do, something that needs to be a certain way, or needs to be professionally or properly written.

Journaling is a place to do something you want to do and in any way you want to do it. Imperfection encouraged.

Watch the instagram Reel

Watch Here

How the Pandemic Made My Journaling Practice More Important Than Ever Before

Unsplash | Tonik

It has been 1 whole year since we entered the pandemic. I agree when people have said it has been both the fastest and slowest year of their life.

I've noticed how much my life has changed, I have changed, and my habits have changed.

My journaling habit has stuck though and this past year has showed me exactly why to keep going with it.

Here are 3 ways the pandemic re-enforced my journaling habit:

Something constant when many things were changing.

I remember the second week of March 2020 very vividly. I showed up to my journal each morning amazed at how fast things had changed from the day before.

We've heard before that change is constant, but it had never been more true that week or even the months we had ahead.

We lost the sense of predictability and certainty.

I had my journaling practice going, but I had really gotten steady with it right before the pandemic. It is like the universe knew I needed to prepare to have something constant in my life.

Journaling became one of my only constants and gave me some sense of predictability and certainty. I didn't know if I was doing anything else I planned to do, but I was certain that I was going to show up to my journal.

Became a safety net when things went wrong.

People say that when you enter new challenges or life transitions, it is smart to have a safety net of people to support you through it.

While I was thankful to have supportive people around me during the pandemic, I know those people were having a tough time too.

Finding the energy to support ourselves was hard enough and didn't leave us a lot of energy left to support others.

Journaling was always a support for me, but it really became my safety net. My safe space to let out every feeling I had for this thing none of us had been through before. It was the outlet that served me most during this tough time.

Kept record of key events, feelings, and happenings during that time.

I knew when this started happening that this was going to be a very important time in history.

I started writing down all the little things I could so that I could remember what it was like down the road. I attribute so much of my memory to writing things down in my journal.

Although there may be sad things we may not want to remember, I've tried to remember the good things that made this time in the pandemic so unique: having dinner with my family every night for 7 weeks, designing a work from home space, doing yoga outside to get out of the house, and more.

--

I'm feeling extra thankful for this journaling practice right now. This past year encouraged me to keep it up and ensured me that I have an outlet to go to when next challenge comes my way.

4 Strategies For Creating A Consistent Journaling Practice

Unsplash | Jess Bailey

Starting a daily journaling practice is one thing, but creating a consistent journaling practice is another challenge.

Some days we don't feel like it. Some days we forget. Some days life gets in the way.

How can we ensure we show up to our journal for even 5 minutes?

I journaled for 2 years before I would say my practice became truly a consistent one, so I know it isn't easy.

Here are 4 strategies I used to create a daily journaling practice that stuck.

Plan a time you're going to journal.

If you don't put it in the plan, your journaling practice is likely to get lost in the day.

Plan out the night before when you're going to get in your journaling practice the next day.

Everyone is different on the time of day they like journaling, but if you've never journaled before, I recommend adding it to your morning routine. Journaling in the morning makes it less likely for it to get overshadowed by other things that pop up throughout the day.

Do it before or after something you already do.

Adding a new habit or practice to your day can seem challenging. If you link journaling to something you already do, it can make adding a new thing to your day seem a little more manageable.

Place it before or after making your morning coffee. Maybe you do it before you kick off your work day. Maybe it is before you go to bed every night.

Put it somewhere in your day where it feels good and you can see yourself making it happen.

Use daily journal prompts.

Journal prompts can be a question or statement that you answer in your journal.

Having a daily question or statement to answer can make you more likely to show up to your journal. It can make journaling not feel like such an open-ended task, but a rewarding task that can be accomplished. It can also be a great way to kick off your journal entry if you don't know what to write.

You can think of answering a daily journal prompt as an accountability partner to showing up to your journal.

I have created some daily journal prompts you can use here if you want a place to start.

Look at is as a "get to do" instead of a "have to do."

There are probably a lot of things that you have to do in your day. It is a long list, and yes, planning out your journaling session may feel like it is adding to the list.

How long is your "get to do" list? Do you have a "get to do" list? Adding your journaling practice may be a good place to start.

It may not feel like a "get to do" when you first start journaling as it can still feel challenging, but viewing your journaling practice as something that you get to do for you will make you more likely to show up to it each day.

Watch the Instagram Reel

Watch Here

3 Ways Journaling Can Help Elevate Your Career

Unsplash | Damian Zaleski

When we think of journaling, we may think of it as a place to process feelings or ideas that we have. It is a very personal process and the words we write aren't usually shared with others.

The thing about journaling is that what we do behind closed doors affects what we do when we open the door to the world. We can use journaling as a tool to help us understand who we want to be and what we want to do.

This can include in our careers. Journaling about our feelings or ideas about our current or future careers can help us show up in the way that we want to.

Here are 3 ways journaling can help elevate your career.

When you have a big meeting or hard conversation coming up, journaling can prepare you to present concise points confidently.

There can be a lot of anxiety leading up to a big meeting or hard conversation. Journaling can be a place to let all the feelings out.

Letting that out can give you a clear head and get you ready to take on whatever may come.

When it comes to preparing for a big meeting or hard conversation, you can journal out the key points you want to get across. This can keep you on track and away from using too many filler words.

You can think about what kind of tone you want to speak in, as well as the tone you want to respond to people in.

Most importantly, journaling this out can give you the confidence that you're capable of delivering the message and the vision of the meeting or conversation going well.

When you’re facing a tough decision or reoccurring problem,  journaling can encourage you to take action or change your perspective on it.

Sometimes we let decisions or problems sit on the backburner for a little, which can be good for processing them. However, if we let them simmer too long, often things will boil over and create a bigger mess either for us emotionally or externally.

If you're facing a tough decision or reoccurring problem, your journal is a safe space to let the feelings out. If you find yourself writing these feelings out day after day about these decisions or problems, it becomes clear that not much action is being taken.

Journaling can help you switch from being problem-focused to solution-focused. If the decision or problem is still bothering you, you can brainstorm how you could take action on it. If things are completely out of your control, you can decide if and how you're going to change your perspective on the situation.

Your journal is a space to diligently work through your decisions and problems and possibly lead you to a more fulfilling and successful career.

When you are deciding the next steps in your career, journaling can help you get clear on what you need to be doing & who you need to be talking to.

Journaling is a great place for a brainstorm session. Whether it is a bunch of jumbled sentences of a bulleted list, your journal is a great place to let out all the ideas, even the ones that may feel crazy.

If you're contemplating the next steps to take in your career, your journal is a great space to brainstorm all your ideas. Maybe you want to grow on the team you're on.  Maybe you want to move to a different department in the company you're at. Maybe you want to take a totally different path. Get all the possibilities out there.

As you brainstorm, you can start seeing what becomes appealing to you. You may also start figuring out what career moves might best fit with your interests, compensation expectations, family-life, etc.

Once you have an idea of what you're aiming for, you can gain some clarity on what you need to be doing and who you need to be talking with to help you get there.

Watch the instagram reel

Watch Here

---

How To Create A Morning Routine

Unsplash | Jeremy Yap

You may have heard from many successful business leaders, motivational speakers, or other impactful people how a morning routine can make a difference.

After 2 years of having a morning routine and adjusting it in a way that serves me, I have come to agree. It is a way to accomplish a lot early on in my day and start it on my own terms.

So how do you create a morning routine? Here are 7 steps:

Pick an activity you want to add to your morning.

If you want to start creating a morning routine, I recommend starting with why you want to. Is it to start the day feeling productive? Make sure certain things don't get lost in your day? Get some exercise in? Bring a moment of quiet? Pick an activity that contributes to what you want to get out of your morning.

Place it before or after something you already do in the morning.

It can be hard to start a new habit or routine right out of the blue. By attaching it to something you already do, it makes the new activity feel a little more manageable. Placing it before or after, say brushing your teeth, can make the new activity feel like it fits more naturally into your morning.

Figure out what time you need to wake-up.

You are adding things to your morning, so it usually warrants an earlier wake-up time. Give yourself more time than you think you need the first couple of days you try your routine, and then adjust based on what you learn. Also, consider if your wake-up time is now significantly earlier, therefore, you may consider going to bed earlier the night before.

Do the morning routine

You did all the planning, now make it happen. Try to do the morning routine without any judgement and just see how you feel.

Evaluate if the new activity made your morning better.

Whether it succeeded the previously intended purpose of making you feel productive or creating a moment of quiet or not, ask yourself if the activity made your morning better. Plain and simple. If you're in-between as to whether it made it better or not, give it a try for a couple days and you'll likely get some more clarity.

Adjust your morning routine accordingly.

Based on what you learn, adjust your morning routine accordingly. Do you need to give yourself a little more time and wake-up earlier? Do you need to leave that activity out all together? Do you need to do the activity in a different room where there are less distractions? Do what you need.

Add more activities over time.

If you find yourself getting a good grip of the first activity and it is motivating you to add more, go for it. Morning routines can really be a game changer for your day if they're done in a way that serves you. Give yourself permission to evolve your routine over time as you learn more about what you like in different seasons.

Watch the instagram reel

Watch Here

---

How creating downtime could be the difference-maker in your day

When I look back at different times in my life, the amount of downtime I had and what I did with it made a difference in how happy I was. 

When I was in college, I would have told you I didn't have a lot of downtime.

Looking back now, I had a lot of downtime, and I spent a lot of it drinking and partying. I didn't really have any outside interests and was kind of lost.

When I graduated from college and started my post-grad life, I had a lot of downtime after work.

I was excited about this because I felt like I had a clean slate and I got to choose what I wanted to do with those hours I wasn't working. This is when I really started digging into my personal development interests with creating my podcast and starting to take yoga.

Now, about 2.5 years post-grad, I have a lot of interests and do a lot of different things.

I do this thing that when it comes to the weekend where I make sure it is a full schedule. I squeeze things in between other things that are already scheduled. I make plans with myself or with others to fill the free time I do have. I want to make the most of the weekend after all, but I have come to the point where I no longer have any downtime.

Often, I have said that having a full weekend like this is productive and makes me happy. That would be considered a successful weekend.

However, I've noticed that although it may be a "productive" weekend with a lot of things scheduled, I'm not necessarily happy. For me lately, it has left me empty.

When I try to fill every hour of my day with something, whether its something I want to do or other people want me to do, my energy gets diminished. I spread myself too thin. I can't be fully there because I just don't have enough energy left to be there. My cup is empty. I don't feel good.

Is there a balance in all of this?

Is there a way I can be productive and still do a lot of things, but do it in a way that feels good, make me happy, and fills my cup up?

My answer: Creating downtime.

Creating downtime to reset. Time to explore. Time to fill my cup back up.

Time to do whatever I feel like doing. Maybe it is napping, checking emails, watching a movie, starting a hobby, calling a friend, or exercising.

Creating downtime can be the difference between a productive day and a productive day that feels good.

Creating downtime, and using it wisely, can be the difference between living a life of burnout and monotony, and life of happiness and growth.

Here are 3 ways creating downtime could be the difference-maker in your day:

Keeps your mental capacity in check.

There is a lot of times where a friend will say, "hey want to do this thing?" It would be during the only 4 hours in my weekend that I have free.

Or a co-worker will send a message saying, "hey sorry to schedule this meeting during lunch, but it was the only time you had open on your calendar."

While I could physically be there for these things, I know mentally I probably won't be.

It took me a lot of times figuring it out the hard way to realize that we all have a capacity point. It is the point where our body and mind tells us we can't do anymore without a little rest.

Downtime can be a tool or boundary to keep our mental capacity in check. It can be our time that we set to reset and recharge so that we can do the other things we want to do.

I realized it is not about how many activities I can get in my day, but how many activities I can fully be there for.

Teaches you what you like, dislike, need, and want.

I'm the rare person that says they enjoyed post-grad life more than they enjoyed college. Don't get me wrong I loved college, but I think I loved post-grad so much because there was a lot of downtime after work to do whatever I wanted and there wasn't some obvious thing I felt like everyone was doing.

That time was mine and mine to learn a lot about myself. My interests, likes and dislikes, and how I really wanted to spend my time.

I noticed that when we have downtime, we get the chance to take ourselves off of autopilot and really look at what we want to do.

We learn what and who makes us feel good vs. what doesn't.

We learn what we actually desire to do vs. what we are just going along with.

We learn what our body and mind actually need to function vs. just accepting that we are going to feel run down all the time.

We learn what sets our hearts on fire vs. what doesn't, and get clarity on how we want to be spending this life.

Having downtime can remind us what keeps us sane and what to keep coming back to.

Allows you to find new things that are going to push your growth forward.

There are periods of times that I feel stuck. The days start looking like work, sleep, work, sleep. The same thing day after day.

These are the times I want something new, even if I don't know what that is. These periods of time can be frustrating and lead us to feel discontent with life.

I've noticed that I usually get in these moods when I'm just following along with the schedule and don't have a lot of downtime.

New things come out of downtime. New people, new activities, and new ideas emerge out of downtime. We don't have time to give any new things attention without downtime.

The new things are usually what push our growth forward. It gets out of our comfort zone and into the place where we can grow as a person.

Even though it feels like the things on our full schedule are going to help us grow, creating downtime accelerates the growth forward.

--

I'm noticing that it isn't necessarily how many things we can do, but what we do and how we do them.

Are we going to spend time doing things we actually want to do? Are we going to bring our full energy to them?

It is interesting that the downtime that usually happens behind closed doors could be the difference-maker in how we do things out in the world.

Downtime could be our tool, our boundary, our resource, our check point, or even our secret weapon to creating a life we are proud of.

Why 2020 Wasn't a Waste

Kelly Sikkema | Unsplash

When we look back at 2020, a lot of people's reaction will be ugh.

Ugh sums it pretty nicely.

You could also describe 2020 as unpredictable, stressful, or a pure wild card.

My fear is we will look back at 2020 and see it as a waste.

We may say that 2020 happened TO us, but there are ways that 2020 happened FOR us.

---

Here are 6 ways 2020 happened for us.

We got creative.

2020 showed us things didn't have to be a certain way in order for them to be good.

For a long time, we've been stuck in our same old routines, but 2020 has made us look at everything we do from a new angle.

How can we work from home? How can we still stay in shape without going to the gym? How can we continue to connect with others when we are locked up in our houses? How can I take advantage of this extra time I have?

Maybe it's possible that you like the new way of doing things even more.

We didn't make so many plans.

2020 was not the year of the plan; we all know that.

We make plans so we feel like we have control, can plan ahead, and worry less that things won't work out.

2020 showed us that life is not about having everything perfectly planned out. It is about being adaptable enough to enjoy and live in the present moment.

Life has changed every day. We don't have to wrestle with deciding or planning right now.

2020 showed us that we can take things day by day and trust ourselves to plan when the time comes.

We saw that people on social media are real too.

During the early lockdowns in March and April, we saw a lot less perfect and a lot more real popping up on social media.

We saw our social media idols without make-up, what their life looks like at home and not in the spotlight, and that they were going through this hard time too, despite the money or fame they had.

2020 gave us a reminder that the people behind the screens aren't perfect and their lives aren't something we need to compare ours to. They're trying to get through the hard times too.

We were reminded that everyone is going through something.

A lot of times we don't think other people understand. We don't think they understand the boat we are in.

We won't ever completely understand everyone, but 2020 showed us that we are in a similar boat and everyone is going through something. 

Whether that was unemployment, fear about getting the virus, anxiety about giving it to others, frustration that we can't go out places and see people, or loss of hope of when this will be over. 

Everyone is struggling with something. Maybe that means we can give ourselves and others a little more grace.

We learned how to pause.

A lot of us were running around tending to our full schedules before the virus hit.

2020 showed us how to pause.

How to take a moment to reflect. How to take a moment to relax. How to take time to re-evaluate how life looks for us. How to be thankful for the things and people we once took for granted.

2020 taught us that it is ok to take a breather, and sometimes that might be the best thing we can do for ourselves.

We learned how to keep moving forward.

2020 was a tough year. It challenged if, when, and how to move forward.

Even though we were in a moment a pause, 2020 showed us that we can still move forward in the tough times.

We can move forward right now and we don't need to wait for everything to be back to normal. Because as we've seen, what if things don't go back to normal for a while?

We may need to move forward in a way we never have before, but we can do it. It's just up to us to choose if we are going to. 

---

Sometimes we don't know what we need. I have a strong feeling that a lot of us didn't know we needed these lessons this year.

2020 had some aspects that we definitely want to leave in the past, but it also prepared us for the future.

It’s up to us to decide what we are going to take or leave in 2020. Take the good and leave the bad.

It's up to us what we are going to do with what we learned.

2020 was not a waste, but a stepping stone for the better things to come.

Are You Willing To Experiment?: 3 Affirmations When Trying Something New

Andrew Small | Unsplash

We want things out of this life. We want things to be good and we want them to be good now.

It is the perfectionist and go-getter in us.

We say we are willing to take the steps to learn how to get there.

But are we? Are we willing to change in order to get a different outcome?

More than anything, are we willing to experiment?

In life, we can experiment in many ways.

We can experiment by dating different types of people throughout life to help us eventually find our person.

We can experiment by taking different job opportunities to see what we like. 

We can experiment by trying out new hobbies and personal projects to see what feels the best.

But experimenting is hard.

We are hesitant to let go of the old things.

We can be closed off to new, unfamiliar things.

We beat ourselves up for not getting things right the first time.

We grow impatient when things aren't working out.

We become jealous of the people that seem to have it all figured out.

We believe we won't ever be good enough.

We become unmotivated to keep moving forward.

We feel like we are wasting our time.

We don't give ourselves grace.

I don't have experimenting all figured out, but here are 3 affirmations we can use to get us through:

I am figuring it out.

We often beat ourselves up for not getting things right. It is important to remember that we are all, and always will be, a work in progress. No one has it figured out, even if we think they do. We are all good enough at the place in the journey that we are at. Just by you stepping foot into the boxing ring, you have already conquered more than you or a lot of other people have.

I can detach from the old stories in order to find new ones.

A lot of times what is holding us back from getting to bigger and better places is holding onto the way things were before. The old stories keep us from creating new ones. It isn't easy, but we can find a way to get out of our own way and live better than we could have ever imagined.

If I'm putting my whole heart into it, it is not a waste of time. I will learn something no matter what.

When things don't work, we feel like we wasted our time. You may not know it now, but the things you did before will come back to benefit you in the future. If you threw your whole heart into something and gave it all you got, it was worth your time because you will learn from it. This is a reason to always keep moving forward.

--

Here are some resources I really love that also talk about experimenting:

Dare to Lead by Brene Brown

FFTs (F*ing First Times) podcast by Brene Brown

The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron

What is a Personal Project and Why You Want One

A personal project. It is that idea that keeps knocking on your door and is waiting for you to answer.

I answered the door and started exploring personal projects right out of college. It is what made my transition from college to adulthood one of my favorite times of my life.

My personal projects were starting a podcast, developing a daily journaling practice, starting a blog, and enrolling in yoga teaching training.

But a personal project can really be any project, hobby, or habit. It can be anything from taking a photography class, to organizing your basement, writing a book, or developing a steady workout plan.

A personal project is a project, hobby, or habit that you do for your own self-fulfillment.

A personal project is that "other" thing besides work or family. It is that thing you don't do for someone else or as your sole income, but for yourself and your freedom. 

You find it by leaning into your curiosity and interests, and pursue it by laying out an action plan as to when and how you're going to make it happen.

More than anything, personal projects are a way to commit to your self-fulfillment and happiness, and not have it get lost in the craziness of life.

When you hear personal project, you may also think passion project.

I call it a personal project because I think the word passion scares people. When people are asked, "what is your passion," I see them get stressed, especially those who have no idea what to say.

I think this is because our society has put pressure on each person to find their "thing." We all need a niche or one thing we are good at, interested in, and maybe even extremely passionate about.

But what if we are good a lot of things? What if we are interested in a lot of things? What if we don't have a strong interest for anything? What if we want to spend time on one thing now and a different thing later?

Is any or all of this ok? Yes.

Our interests change, the world changes, and we change. We don't have to have one specific passion that we earnestly seek.

It is important to see that there is something distinctively unique inside of us, something personal, that we are meant to discover and explore.

That is what personal projects are for. We can have many small or big ones over many years. It's about pursuing whatever is inside of you in this season of life. 

What is a personal project and what is it not?

It is your box, not someone else's box

We have all these different boxes in our life: work, family, friends, significant other, other responsibilities, etc. A lot of times we try to fit ourselves or spread our time amongst the boxes. But where is our box? Where is the box that we don't have to fit ourselves into? Where is the box that is dedicated to spending time on you?

That is what personal projects for. They give you your own box to spend time putting your smallest and biggest ideas.

A timeline for when something will be pursued, not something that gets put on the back-burner (again)

We say a lot how cool it would be to do "fill in the blank" someday. Well that someday can be today.

Personal projects allow us to make what I call a "growth, but graceful" timeline for completing something. We can create a deadline that is close enough that it motivates us to work on the project, but far enough out so it is realistic and attainable.

An action plan for how you're going to do something, not a forever winding road to the destination

A lot of times we say we want to do something, but we just aren't sure how to do it.

Personal projects allow us to think through and lay out the steps for what we want to do. It allows us to have a glimpse of where we are going, even if that requires a few U-turns along the way.

Time spent on something fulfilling and happy, not something unfulfilling or boring

Our lives are meant to be lived to the fullest, whatever that may look like for us.

Personal projects are a way we can check in on what is actually fulfilling to us. We can be more intentional on doing things that are going to bring us the most amount of happiness, and leave what isn't serving us behind.

Why you want a personal project?

Puts less pressure on receiving happiness from somewhere else

We've all heard, "don't put all your eggs in one basket." It is the same with our happiness. Sometimes we can put overwhelming pressure on 1 thing such as our work or romantic relationships to make us happy. That can be self-sabotaging at times and actually make our relationship with those things worse.

Having a personal project allows us to have another outlet for our happiness and one that we have a lot of power to be creative in. It is often that I notice that my relationships with the other things in my life have gotten better due to being able to pursue my personal projects.

Get to use your downtime how you actually want

When we finally get to have some downtime in our day, we sometimes don't know what to do with ourselves. Our go-to ends up being what the great marketers of the world have told us to do: social media scroll, binge Netflix, and online shop.

While there is nothing wrong with any of those things, personal projects give us the opportunity to consider what we actually want to do. Is it relax and watch Netflix, or make a recipe from the cookbook you've been wanting to open? Neither is right or wrong, but personal projects help us to make the choice of how we actually want to spend our downtime.

Allows you to explore a new version of success

Our forms of success could be what job we have, what house we live in, who we are dating, or how much money we make. What if we measured our success on how happy we were doing something? Not the destination or the result, but the actual journey to doing something?

Personal projects give us the opportunity to explore the activities, practices, and habits that make us the happiest, sometimes guiding us to a better destination than we could have even imagined.

So the question is, are you going to answer the door?

I'm Surrendering So I Can Win: How I'm Navigating Uncertainty & Anxiety

One day at a time.

That is the only way I've made it through this year.

I'm a planner. I make plans to be strategic, have control, think ahead, coordinate with others, and lessen the worry that things won't work out.

Well things haven't worked out according to plan this year.

There has been so much uncertainty and it has given me more anxiety than ever.

I never realized how sensitive I was to uncertainty, but I also have to give myself grace as there has never been more anxiety in one year than this year.

My reaction to the constant uncertainty and anxiety is to isolate myself. Not talk to anyone and say I'm going to figure it out myself. That is my safe space.

However, the uncertainty and anxiety has become so overwhelming that it has become too heavy to carry.

I feel like the little middle schooler again that is carrying too many books around in her backpack. I have been carrying around all the uncertainty and anxiety about the future for many months now and I am worn down and tired.

I have come to the point of surrender.

I'm surrendering…

To the plans.

To things being a certain way.

To people being a certain way.

To things being the same as last year.

To not knowing what is going to happen.

To things that are out of my control.

I thought surrendering meant I was giving up, but it really means I've won.

Surrendering means I've won in the fight against the uncertainty and anxiety. I don't have to fight anymore. I've let it all go and not let it take over my life.

And I can BREATHE.

I'm in the place now where I've let it all go, but where do I go from here?

I feel like 2020 slapped me in the face and said…

1. It's time to be adaptable

2. It's time to put the work in to take care of yourself

So that is what I'm doing.

It isn't easy, but I'm trying my best.

For me right now it looks like…

Going with the flow

Thinking of plans as "tentative"

Having the hard conversations that are actually going to push me forward

Creating flexible options for myself for when things change

Respecting that someone may go about things a different way

Consistently showing up for myself, even on the hard days

I am surrendering, but I'm still winning.

Boredom to Creativity: 4 Keys to Kick-Starting Your Dream Project

Unsplash | Jess Bailey

One of my least favorite feelings? Boredom.

When boredom happens, I do what I can to get rid of it.

Some people say boredom is good as it forces you to be creative with your time.

However, in the age of technology and the world at our fingertips, we aren't always channeling that boredom into creativity.

A lot of times we channel our boredom into scrolling or going down the rabbit hole of social media.

Often, it happens that we are looking at things we don't really care about or don't add value to our life. We will just look for anything and everything that could stimulate us and counteract the boredom.

Whenever there is a season where it gets colder, there isn't as much going on, or you're stuck at home, a little more boredom kicks in than usual.

How can we channel boredom into creativity? How can we channel the boredom into things we care about and are going to add value to our lives?

A project or hobby.

I love a good project or hobby and I love supporting people in theirs.

I started getting into projects and hobbies right after college. I felt I had this new sense of time on my hands and I knew I wanted to do something with it. So, I jumped into projects.

In the past 2.5 years, I have started a podcast, a blog, yoga teacher training, and have a few more things coming down the pipeline.

I've found these projects to be fulfilling and made me enjoy not just the project, but even the other parts of my life more.

I've gotten asked a lot of questions around how we can find these projects or hobbies.

My initial answer is the projects I pursued just came to me. However, looking back to when I started projects, they wouldn't have been possible to find without a few key things.

Here are 4 things that led me to the projects I wanted to pursue.

Realized what I loved and kept doing that.

I think a lot of times in order to pursue a project or hobby, we feel like we have to do something completely new. When really the project or hobby could be something we are already doing.

I started paying attention to what I loved and kept doing it. Eventually, something bigger evolved from the things I was already doing.

I was obsessed with podcasts and listened to them everyday. I ended up starting my own podcast. I loved writing and journals. I ended up starting a blog. I loved yoga and connecting the mind and body together. I decided to sign up for yoga teacher training. 

We can take what we already love and already doing, and scale it up.

Started paying attention to what wasn't bringing me fulfillment & stopped doing that.

Sometimes we need to get rid of the old in order to bring in the new.

I realized that in order to have time to explore and pursue these projects and hobbies, I needed to get rid of the things that were in my way. There were things I was doing that weren't fulfilling and taking time away from something, like a project or hobby, that could be fulfilling.

I was someone who, and still am sometimes, uses excessive social media scrolling or Netflix watching to stimulate me. Don't get me wrong, I love both social media and Netflix, but an excessive amount isn't very fulfilling to me. I had to challenge myself to channel my boredom towards something more creative and fulfilling (which was not easy btw as these platforms are meant to be addictive).

We can challenge ourselves to take the things that aren't serving us and replace it with a project or hobby that is more fulfilling.

Gave myself permission to reinvent myself.

If we want to be something new or different, we have to do something new or different.

Before I started working on my first project, I told myself I was allowed to do something I haven't done before. Anything was possible.

This was key as sometimes we don't pursue projects because we don't feel like they're "us" or that people will think they're weird.

Each day, we can wake up and do whatever you want to do and be whatever you want to be. So much so that each day can be a new project or hobby.

Opened my eyes, ears, mind, and heart to new things.

Are you walking around with a closed heart or open heart?

In order to find new projects and hobbies, you have to walk around with open eyes, ears, mind, and heart. If you don't, you will only see, hear, think, and feel the things you did before and nothing new.

Being open allows you to receive the signs and clarity on what you're to pursue.

Most of the time, the clarity comes when you least expect.

Boredom can be hard and frustrating. It can be challenging to get rid of or even channel the way we want to.

It can take time, energy, and resiliency.

I've found that it is all worth it because we all have a project or hobby to offer the world.

What's yours going to be?

Why I've Been Journaling for the Past 3 Years

It's been 3 years since my first journal entry.

I remember the day I started journaling I was in such a hard place. I remember sitting in that spot for a very long time, doing nothing about it. Eventually, I couldn't do it anymore and would do anything to feel better.

I had heard time and time again from people I admired that journaling was an amazing practice to help you think through things. I was at a breaking point so maybe this was a healthy outlet to make things better.

You know when people ask "when did everything change for you?"

The day I tell them is the day I started journaling. And I'll tell you why.

First to be clear, I haven't journaled every day for the past 3 years. I didn't start steady right out of the gate.

At the beginning, I mostly journaled when things were hard, and I wouldn't when things got better. I relate this to when someone maybe stops praying when things go from bad to better.

Sadly, there are those times when things go back to being bad, and that is when I would always go back to my journal to let it all out.

A few months into journaling, I started writing not just about the bad things, but the good things too, like life milestones or trips I wanted to remember.

About 1 year in, I was started writing about the big ideas I had for my life.

About 2 years in, I noticed that I loved journaling so much that I wanted to make it part of my morning routine. 

Not long after passing the year 2 mark, I went on a long weekend trip and was so busy that I didn't journal. When I got back from the trip, I was shocked how lost I felt. I was shocked how much I didn't feel like myself.

I guess I shouldn't have been so shocked that I wasn't feeling like myself because I went from doing something for myself every day, to leaving myself out in the cold (but literally that trip was so cold). 

I got so used to journaling being…

my anchor.

my release.

my self care.

my getaway.

my safe space to grow without judgement.

where my biggest ideas first get written down.

where things are more beautiful when they're imperfect.

where the before, during, and after emotions are let out, then held for safe-keeping.

where I come back to myself to get re-centered on who I am and what I want to do next.

If one takes that away, you're bound to feel cold.

From arriving home from that trip to now at the year 3 mark, it has been 293 days. I have journaled every single one of them.

I tell people the day I started journaling was the day everything changed because it was the first time I chose to show up for myself.

For the first time, I chose to prioritize myself, commit to myself, prove to myself that I could put in the work, and that I could do something to take care of myself.

I chose journaling as my way to doing something for myself, while others may do this another way.

We could do it by going for a walk or maybe meditating. Or we could do it just by rolling out of bed and putting on something other than pajamas because life can be that tough sometimes.

Some days I don't feel like journaling, but I know now that those are the days I probably need to show up the most.

So I want to make sure I continue to show up for myself.

I want to show up when things are hard.

I want to show up when things are easy.

I want to show up when things are bad.

I want to show up when things are good.

I want to show up when things are boring.

I want to show up when things are busy. 

I want to show up for myself each and every day because I owe that to myself.

There is power in showing up and doing something for you to show that you are here and ready to conquer the world.

So on this 3 year mark of journaling, I'm letting myself be proud for how far I've come.

I chose to show up.

I chose how I was going to show up.

I chose when I was going to show up.

It may have taken me 2.5 years of journaling and 25 years of life, but I am choosing to show up to my journal each and every day. 

Because showing up for ourselves can be the difference between just existing and actually living.

Here's to many more years of journaling and showing up for me.

Lean Into What You Want To Do, Not What You Want To Be

I remember when I decided I wanted to be a podcaster.

I had listened to so many podcasts for a long time and really admired the hosts. They seemed like they were having so much fun and sharing some valuable content with the world.

I wanted to be just like them.

When I found out one of my favorite podcasters had made a podcasting course, I jumped right in.

To me, being a podcaster looked like…

Consistently releasing episodes once per week

Doing interviews with inspiring guests

Recording insightful solo episodes

Posting often on social media to promote your show

Having hundreds of listens on every episode

After over a year of doing what I thought a podcaster is supposed to do, I realized I didn't even like doing half the things it took to put on a podcast.

I didn't realize that being a podcaster also came along with hours of editing, making sure sound quality was good, coordinating time in your and your guest's busy schedules to record, and a lot of patience to build and engage an audience over time.

I found myself uninspired, burnt out, and unfulfilled.

Don't get me wrong, I loved creating and doing the podcast as it is one of the things I most proud of for myself.

However, I found the biggest mistake I made in approaching this project was I was trying to be like other podcasters, instead of exploring what I wanted podcasting to look like for me.

I realized I was focusing so much on what I wanted to BE instead of what I wanted to DO. This is what left me unfulfilled.

As I transitioned out of podcasting and started to look for next projects or new goals, I knew I had to approach the next thing with a different mindset.

what do I want to do instead of what do I want to be

When I started channeling this mindset of what do I want to do, I realized one thing I wanted to do was write.

I had always enjoyed writing when I was younger. I was an avid journaler. My favorite part of the podcasting was writing the solo episodes. I just found writing very soothing.

I didn't know what I wanted to be with writing, but that didn't matter because this was about doing.

I already had a website, so why not just starting writing a blog on there and see what comes of it. I didn't even consider myself a blogger, I was just writing.

I have been writing for 5 months now. I try to write every morning before the day gets away from me.

I found I was writing so much that I started creating a blog post every week.

I wanted to share my writing with others so I started talking about it on Instagram and Facebook. I felt like I wanted to share even more so I started a weekly newsletter.

I started to see some traction with people reading my content so I started tracking my growth. I was curious as to how many people were reading my content and where they were getting it from.

Despite all the things I was doing with writing and evolution of it, here is what really happened when I made this transition from what I want to be to what I want to do.

Tasks became fulfilling

When I was focusing on what I wanted to be, I would make a checklist of all the things I needed to do and maybe one of them was fulfilling. When I started focusing on what I wanted to do, the tasks, even if they weren't the most exciting, felt so aligned to who I was and what I wanted to do that they became fulfilling.

Creativity was allowed

When I was focusing on what I wanted to be, I felt like there was only 1 path and it was the path I watched someone else take. When I started focusing on what I wanted to do, it really opened up my mind to all the different paths I could take. It showed me that I didn't need to be afraid to take the road others hadn't. I could channel my curiosity and interests, and take the path that was best for me. Sometimes this took me down unexpected paths that I didn’t know were possible.

Goals seemed manageable

Sometimes having a goal of "being" something can seem overwhelming and almost impossible to achieve. It can be hard to even know the first step to take. When I set my sights on what I wanted to do, I could break things down into smaller steps to complete the task. I found myself so much more motivated to go after the task or goal now that it seemed manageable.

My own path and pace of growth was defined

When I was striving so hard to be something, I got impatient with my growth. I was wondering why I wasn't getting the results I wanted or results as fast as I wanted. When I started focusing on what I wanted to do, I saw growth happening in the direction I wanted and a pace that felt right to me. I've found sometimes the continual, slow growth is the most rewarding.

Making the mindset shift from what do I want to be to what do I want to do has been a game-changer for me.

It has led me to something I'm passionate about.

It has led me to feel like I have new purpose for my life.

It has led me to believe that all the things I want to do will lead me to a person I'm proud to be.

For When You've Given Up on Self-Love

Unsplash | Dan Freeman

"We have made our happiness conditional."

I went to a yoga class not too long ago and they started off our session with this.

This made my brain wake up a little bit as I was trying to get it to relax.

We have made our happiness conditional in so many ways.

We make it depend on our jobs, our significant others, what we look like, how much money we have, and so many other things that we seek happiness from.

They went on with the session to say how we need to start making it unconditional.

My mind starting exploring how one might do that. How do we make our happiness unconditional, not changing based on the external world?

I have actually explored this for a long time, but hadn't really had this specific question asked before.

My answer?

We love ourselves for who we are. We love ourselves before bringing anything else into the mix.

I look at loving yourself as growing the roots of a tree. We need to grow strong roots, a strong us, so once our trunks grow and flowers bloom, we can weather the storm no matter what comes our way. We work on building ourselves so we can build our life.

Even when things are going well, the storms come. They always do.

Work gets frustrating, you go on some bad first dates, you gain a few pounds, you feel like you don't always have the money to do the things you want to do, you get some unexpected bad news.

How does one love themselves and make their happiness unconditional when the storms hit?

We always hear the answer "love yourself, love who you are, love every strength and flaw." I almost get frustrated or confused sometimes when I hear this because if it was that easy, we would all be doing it, right?

There are so many books, podcasts, and social media accounts promoting self love, and I've read, listened, and followed a lot of them. You can't help but think that self love must be something people are struggling with if this many people are talking about and people, like me, are consuming it.

Maybe it feels confusing and we continue to talk about it because self love looks different for everyone. We are all just trying to figure it out how it looks for us.

I have experimented with a lot of different ways I can love myself more, but this is what self love looks like this to me.

I am complete, everything else is extra.

It took me some time, but I realized that we are complete on our own and everything else just adds or doesn't add value to our lives.

When we see ourselves as complete, we can let go of things we are holding onto that aren't adding value to our lives.

When we see ourselves as complete, we can stop feeling the need to seek out things that are going to complete us.

When we see ourselves as complete, we can have reassurance that we are capable of weathering the storm.

You, me, us are already complete, everything else is just extra.

And those extra things can be absolutely wonderful and enhance our lives. A significant other, a big house, or an impressive job title.

They can make our lives greater, but they also could not.

It’s up to us to decide if they're adding value. Hold on tight and don't take for granted the parts that are adding value, and let go of the things that are not.

It all comes back to knowing that we are complete. It all comes back to loving ourselves. It all comes back to making our happiness unconditional.